YOU KNOW WHATS FUCKING STUPID
WHEN YOUR FAMILY MAKES YOU GO SOMEWHERE WITH THEM AND YOU TELL THEM YOU DONT WANT TO
AND THEN WHEN YOURE ALREADY OUT THEY BLAME YOU FOR BEING ALL ANGRY AND TELL YOU YOU RUIN EVERYTHING
OH WELL MY FUCKING APOLOGIES
two deer walk out of a gay bar, one turns to the other and says “man, i can’t believe i blew thirty bucks in there”.
this literally took me forever to get
I’m trying hard to live by Cat Principles.
1- I am glorious above all things
2- Eat when hungry, sleep when sleepy, play when bored
3- Affection is given and received on my terms and only mine
4- Show displeasure clearly.
6- Demand the things you want. If they aren’t given, demand them again, but louder this time.
7- If you are touched when you don’t want to be, say so. If they continue to touch you, make them bleed.
What if humans had wings and the feathers were the same color as our natural hair color but we could dye them different colors if we wanted to or add glitter and there were salons dedicated to wings where we could get them preened and colored and there was a whole section of fashion and health dedicated to wings and work-outs designed to make your flight muscles stronger for endurance or speed and and and
Dude, what are you on? I want a hit.
so we went to an improv show and we played this game where somebody is given a trait and another player has to guess what it is based on how they answer questions
and one of the players who was a taxidermist was asked “what do you do for a living?” and she replied “oh you know…. stuff” AND TO THIS DAY THAT IS THE GREATEST PUN I HAVE EVER HEARD MY GOD